Our most heartbreaking Christmas present a picture of the children
we may never see again; A haunting interview with the couple judged
by social services not able enough to raise their own family.
Femail real life
By FIONA BARTON D. MAIL Thursday 22 December 2005
THE couple sit surrounded by piles of Christmas decorations, cards
and presents.
This used to be a magical time of year for them and they smile
as they tell of past Christmases when they sat up all night wrapping
the parcels and hanging tinsel.
But this year, the most important part of their celebrations
is missing.
Their four-year-old daughter and 18-month-old son will be spending
Christmas in a foster home while social workers arrange their
adoption.
The shocking story of how this family was torn apart by Essex
social services because the mother has a low IQ and is deemed
too slow to understand the needs of her children was revealed
by the Daily Mail earlier this year.
The children were taken into care after social workers judged
that the mother did not have 'regular' routines for her son and
daughter, that she left the girl to play alone, could not cook
simple meals and took too long brushing her teeth.
The father, who does not have learning difficulties, was, bizarrely,
said to have too many routines.
The parents had not hurt their children or let them go hungry.
There was no sign of abuse or cruelty and, sitting in secret,
a family court judge told the couple they had done nothing wrong,
but still ordered that the children be put up for adoption to
give them 'a better life'.
The view of the social services and the court was that the children
would not reach their full potential with their parents.
A REMARKABLE outcry has followed the original story, with parents,
politicians, social workers and disability rights campaigners
still contacting the Mail, eight months later, to voice their
outrage and dismay at what some believe is an experiment in social
engineering.
And the feelings of loss have not begun to diminish for the father
and mother.
It is now 12 months since they last saw their little boy and
girl, but they have just received their first longed-for photographs
of the children.
In the set of pictures, their daughter has her arm around her
little brother as they pose in a garden, and is smiling shyly
for the camera.
Their son, who is almost unrecognisable from the baby they last
saw at a fraught social services contact meeting, gazes up at
his sister.
The reminder of the year they have lost with their children has
made the couple weep, but it has also made them more determined
than ever to fight on.
There have been many setbacks since they started their legal
battle to get the children back more than a year ago.
The couple, who cannot be named to protect their children's identity,
were banned last November from seeing the children after the mother,
driven to despair by the stress of losing her children, pulled
a social worker's hair during an access meeting.
They have battled through the secretive family court system,
but they have lost all appeals. Mrs Justice Pauffley sitting in
the Court of Appeal said: 'They are decent people, but they are
not capable of managing the intricate anticipatory process of
parenting.' Now their lawyer is applying to the House of Lords
for justice and the couple are determined to go to the European
Court of Human Rights if necessary.
'I think social services thought we would give up and go away,
but we will not,' the father says.
'The social workers have asked us to prepare a life-story book
for the kids, but we have refused because that would mean we have
given up and are getting ready to say goodbye. We are not and
we never will.' The mother, who is 29, has a low IQ but can read
and write, is equally determined. 'It doesn't get any easier,'
she says.
'I am very lonely here on my own.
Social services thought I couldn't cope on my own, but they got
the wrong impression.
'They thought we would just forget the children, but we can never
do that.'
The couple are only too aware that while their lawyers make applications
and prepare the case, the children are being readied for adoption.
Two potential adoptive families have already dropped out of the
process, one after it was discovered that the little boy has hydrocephalus,
a swelling of the brain, which is affecting his development.
The parents fear that the condition is the result of an incident
while their son has been in council care, and detectives in the
Essex Child Abuse Investigation Unit are currently reviewing the
boy's medical records.
The concerns over the child's health are causing the couple still
more anxiety.
Last week, as they prepared for a lonely Christmas at their neat
maisonette, they told how they are haunted by glimpses of other
fairhaired children in the streets and shops.
The father, a 38-year-old messenger at a large manufacturing
company, says: 'It is so long since we saw them. It can't be right
to keep them away from their mother.
'They look so beautiful, but when I first saw the pictures social
services gave us I sat in the car and cried. I got so upset about
it.
'It still hurts so much. Even when I see a blonde-haired girl
or a baby boy in the street, it hits me so hard.' WE SAW this
little blond boy in the supermarket the other day, the same age
as our little boy and he kept looking at me and smiling,' adds
the mother, a pretty young woman. 'It was so hard for me. There
are things to remind us all over the place. And now Christmas
.
She gestures at the bags of gifts they have prepared for their
children.
In one, sweets and treats, in another, a shiny toy truck which
makes an engine noise and a cuddly toy dog with a brush to groom
it.
Last week, they wrote gift tags to their children 'from Mummy
and Daddy' and took the presents to the social services offices
in the hope they will be passed on to the youngsters.
The father does not know if they will reach his children.
'They are opened to make sure they are suitable, and I don't
know what they tell the children about where the presents come
from. I don't even know if they know they are from their mum and
dad.
'We put a photograph of the four of us in with their birthday
presents earlier this year, but it was taken out because social
services don't want them to have pictures of us.' The couple's
Christmas will be a quiet affair.
There will be presents and turkey, but the spectre of what should
have been taking place will cast a shadow over the day.
'The present we really want is for our children to be returned,'
says the mother.
'That's what we want most in the world. To have them home with
us.
'Maybe next Christmas,' she adds wistfully.
Comment: Not the Daily Mail:
Note that Essex Police have to explain why an in-depth investigation
into the younger child’s head injury/illness has not taken
place with the commensurate robust and diligent forensic intensity.
This is a public interest matter. The public and the press and
our MPs need to know just what is going on!
The suspicious injury/illness took place after the child was
taken into Care.
Social workers and Essex Social Services have tried to convince
the police that ‘ there is no problem’……Yes!
You are reading this correctly.
The police are aware of other material information that raises
serious doubts about how the ‘investigation’ is progressing.
We are watching to see if Essex Social Services have in fact
directed Essex Police. It won’t be the first time this has
happened.
WATCH THIS SPACE!!!!!!!!!!!!
END
We know that Essex is not in Scotland but the same corrupt things
happen every day here too, one case just this week, where a mother
has to sit and cry because 2 of her kids have been stolen by the
social services. More on that in the New Year.